


Holding Space

by PanDemoniummm



Category: Chilling Adventures of Sabrina (TV 2018)
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-07
Updated: 2020-02-07
Packaged: 2021-02-28 03:20:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,442
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22596952
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PanDemoniummm/pseuds/PanDemoniummm
Summary: "I need you to hold me"It seems that just about everyone is leaving to spend time with their families for Winter Solstice and Y/N can't help but feel... alone.
Relationships: Nicholas Scratch (Chilling Adventures of Sabrina)/Reader
Kudos: 23





	Holding Space

A whirlwind of space and time flurried around you, dropping you down in the middle of the floor. The floor of Nicholas Scratch’s bedroom, to be exact. 

You stood there for a moment, not knowing exactly what to say, just knowing that you wanted- you needed to not be alone, you needed to feel loved, you needed to be… held.

You gripped your arm, trying to say his name, but barely able to choke it out.

“Nick..”

Nick woke up immediately, his head groggily snapping up as a growing look of concern appeared on his face. 

You’d be surprised that he heard you, you were barely able to get the words out, but at this point he’d somehow developed this sixth sense for knowing when you weren’t okay.

He swept the covers of his bed to the side, walking towards you when he noticed you weren’t making an effort to join him in bed.

“Hey,” he said, taking your head in his hands.

“What’s wrong,“ he asked, examining your face, "are you hurt? What happened, are you okay?”

You looked down, tears spilling over.

“Did someone hurt you?” Nick asked, “Because, I swear to Satan, if someone did, I’m going to-”

“No,” you said, shaking your head, “no one hurt me, I just…”

You felt his thumb slowly running back and forth across your cheek, chasing your anxiety away.

“What, baby?” he asked softly, “What’s going on?”

“I-” you started, “I just need you to hold me.”

Seconds after you choked those words out, you broke, falling into him and sinking down to the floor. He quickly wrapped his arms around you, gently pulling you into his lap and holding you as close as he could. You leaned into his shoulder, sobbing for what felt like forever.

Eventually, your sobbing faded into a few stray tears. You took a deep breath in and sighed, finally able to breathe without shaking again.

“Thank you,” you said, voice barely above a whisper.

“Anytime, my love,” he responded, kissing your forehead, “anytime.”

You smiled and hummed happily, nuzzling your head back into his shoulder.

“Y/N,” he said after a moment of silence.

You looked up at him. 

He cradled your face in his hand and boldly stated, “I would do anything for you… you know that, right?”

You smiled and leaned into his touch, wondering how in hell you got so lucky.

“Yes,” you said, “and I love you so much for it.”

He smiled, capturing your lips in such a soft and loving kiss you melted right there, in his arms.

“So what’s been going on?” he asked, “What started all this?”

“I don’t know, nothing really,” you responded.

He looked down at you with one eyebrow raised in disbelief.

"You never were a great liar, Y/L/N.”

“Only around you,” you pointed out, with a smirk.

“You didn’t answer my question.”

You sighed, not wanting to relive that pain again. You knew you needed to talk about it, though. That was part of the reason why you came here, after all.

“Nothing specific, really,” you admitted, “just a lot of different things happening that all reminded me of something else and ended up with me panicking and-” you paused.

~

You were in your room, alone, trying to fall asleep when all the memories of people you loved leaving or not being there for you kept rushing into your head. Winter Solstice was approaching, so after all the Academy rituals and celebrations were over, students were allowed to leave campus for break. So, one by one, you watched your friends go home to celebrate with their families - just like the one you didn’t have. 

You knew you were loved. By your friends, your chosen family, by Nick… Satan you loved that man so much. 

Even with all that, sometimes you couldn’t help but just feel…

Alone.

You knew you weren’t. But the feeling got stronger and stronger until you were shaking on your bed, eyes clouded with tears, trying to convince that open, empty feeling inside you to fucking go away. 

Until you remembered:

Nick is still here.

You smiled in relief, relaxing just a bit as you remembered that your partner, the one who always had your back no matter what, was still here. 

You felt yourself getting anxious again at the thought of being so open and vulnerable with him, but you shut that down.

“I love him,” you reminded yourself, “and I trust him - with my life. Also, it’s not like this is the first time I’ve let him in or anything like that.”

And it wasn’t. Every single time you had opened up to him, he had been there, held space for your pain, and helped you every. single. time. You knew he wouldn’t mind doing the same again this time.

You took a deep breath, convincing yourself that this was the right thing to do, and teleported yourself to Nicholas’s bedroom.

~

“And?” Nick asked, breaking the silence.

“And just… not feeling loved, I guess.”

You felt Nick’s grip on you tighten as you said that. He slid a finger underneath your chin, tilting your face up to look at him.

“What?” he asked, sounding hurt, confused, and shocked all at the same time. You could see tears beginning to form in his eyes.

“Wait- No, no, baby, it’s- it’s absolutely not you at all,” you reassured him, quick to make sure he knew he wasn’t the reason for you feeling like this.

“I love you… so much… and you have never made me feel unloved a single day in my life,” you whispered in between kisses.

He sighed in relief, kissing you once more before whispering “I love you,” back.

“Then what is it?” he asked, “What’s making you feel so… unloved?”

“Everyone’s leaving,” you said, “I mean, I know they’re all coming back and they’re not actually leaving me or anything, it’s just-”

“Everyone going home for the holidays?” he interjected.

You nodded, your breath catching in your throat.

“I just- I just wish…” you started, on the verge of tears again, “Why does everyone else get to have some form of a supportive family who actually loves them, while I just get stuck with fucking nothing?!”

At this point you had fully erupted into violent tears, sobs wracking your body and pulling the air from your lungs.

Nicholas had no choice but to pull you even tighter into his arms while his own tears fell down his cheeks.

“I don’t know baby,” he said, his tears showing in his voice.

You pulled back enough to see that he was crying too, so you wrapped your arms around his torso and held onto him as he held onto you, crying together at the pain of not having a family to go back to whenever you wanted or needed it.

Nicholas knew your pain. You knew this. His parents died when he was younger, and the only family he had left was his familiar.

You had a family, but not a good one. One that was abusive, and neglectful, and forced you to leave your home as soon as you were able to.

And so you both ended up at the Academy of Unseen Arts, him finding a home and community after he realized he no longer had one, and you needing both of those after running away and creating a new identity.

Somehow your paths wove themselves together, by will of the Dark Lord or otherwise, and you found each other. You became each others’s family, promising to be there for each other no matter what.

So here you both were, holding each other in the middle of the night, feeling each others’ pain and loving each other through it.

Eventually, when your tears ran out, Nick picked you up and carried you to his bed, crawling in with you and pulling you back into his arms.

“I love you,” he whispered, when he thought you were asleep, “more than anything else, more than myself, more than.. the world. There is absolutely nothing I wouldn’t do for you, and I promise to be here for you, with you, through all the pain, all the heartache, until the day I die. And maybe even after that, if I can manage it.”

Your heart swelled as you heard him whisper those heartfelt promises into your hair, feeling him press a kiss to your forehead before settling his chin on top of your head.

“I love you too, Nicholas Scratch,” you replied, leaning up to kiss him one more time before falling asleep - feeling safe, loved - in his arms.


End file.
